BEING A DICKHEAD

FRIDAY I BEEN SUCH A DOUUUUCHE ! FUN NIGHT THO.

CANT BELIEVE IM SKIPPING LESSONS AGAIN AHAHA OH NO THIS IS GONNA BE BAD

KINDA AFRAID // EXCITED ABOUT THE NEXT TWO MONTHS. MY BESTEST MATE (J) IS GONNA BE IN REHAB AND MY DAD IS ON VACATION FOR 2 WEEKS. IM GONNA BE SO LONELY AND BORED !!! FUCK I NEED TO BE COOLER WITH PEOPLE .....
I HOPE IM NOT GONNA TURN INTO A MASSIVE WHORE TO HAVE COMPANY -.- LIKE F, S, BOYS, MEN, DUDES YA KNOW

PERFECT

I THINK IM GOING OUT TONIGHT. ITS 21:30 NOW :S GOTTA FIND SOMETHING TO WEAR !!! DRUNK ALREADY OHJEEE

KÜSS DICH INS KNIE!

CHILLING HOME BEING SICK. NOT TOO BAD THO. JUST SCARED COZ OF SCHOOL :(

PLANNING ON NOT GOING OUT THIS WEEKEND. I KNOW IM GONNA WANT TOO......BUT IM SURE IT WOULD BE BETTER I DONT.
NEED CLOTHES. WANNA CARE ABOUT MY APPEARANCE A LOT MORE. I LET MYSELF GO ...
GONNA BORROW GOs CAMERA (CANON) AS SOON IM FIT FIT AGAIN. WICH WILL BE BY SATURDAY I THINK HIHI THEN TAKE LOT OF PICTURES IN NICE SUNLIGHTS AND STUFF
I NEED TO START SOCIALIZING BEING SOBER AND STUFF LIKE WITHIN THE WEEK. NOT ONLY AT THE WEEKEND.

ONE WAY OR ANOTHER

SO. SKIPPING SCHOOL AGAIN TODAY. SAME SHIT AS YESTERDAY. AND FRIDAY.... BUT IVE GO AN ATTEST WHOHO !!! SO HOPING IM NOT THROWN SOON.

JUST REALIZED HOW SUPERFICIAL I AM. BUT SUN MAKES ME HAPPY. LIGHT.
THIS MORNING I WALKED AROUND (WHEN SKIPPING SCHOOL) IT WAS ICE COLD BUT BEAUTIFUL! I LISTENED TO MUSIC LOOKED AT THE WORLD THE SHAPES THE PEOPLE THE BUILDINGS THE LIGHTS. LOVED IT. SO CHILLINNN
NOW IM HOME AND STARTING TO GET BORED. HAH

BIG SEXY WITH THA GLASSES

-I BROKE MY FOOT
-I EAT LIKE AN ELEFANT
-I SNOGGED A RANDOM GUY FROM LONDON LAST NIGHT ( WAS REALLY GOOD ACTUALLY, AND AN AMAZING NIGHT AS I WASNT DRUNK MOST OF THE TIME. AND YEAHHH IT GOT A LITTLE SLUTTY THERE BUT WHO CARES///SO MUCH BETTER WHEN YOU DONT FEEL ANYTHING!!!!!)
-REALLY CONFUSED RIGHTNOW CAUSE OF BEING WASTED AT Js PLACE WITHH DIFFRENT GUEST WHILE I WAS ASLEEP AND WAKING UP AND FALL ASLEEP AND WAKING UP AND MISSING ALL THE FUN !!! WHEN I FINALLY WOKE UP (ABOUT AN HOUR AGO) J WAS CRYING AND THE BOYS WERE GONE AND THEN I WANTED TO GET MY STUFF TO LEAVE WITH OTHER J I REALIZED THAT THEY WERE BOTH GONE??! SO I WENT HOME AND HERE I GO..................
-THINK IM GONNA TREAT MY SELF A SUPER CHILLY DAY
-IM KINDA EXCITED ABOUT SCHOOL TOMORROW :)

DU BIST AM SCHÖNSTEN VON HINTEN

IM SKIPPING SCHOOL AND EATING HALF BAKED BROWNIES IN FRONT OF TELLY. HAVIN LOTS OF CIGGYS AND STAYING IN TONIGHT. I THINK IM GONNA CANN GOGO LATER TO GET MONEY OR SHOPPING (WINDOW) OR CAMERA! THUG LIIIIFE

BÄMS

HI. IM HIGH, JUST CAME HOME, HUNGRYYY FOR FOOD FROM IKEA, SCHNITZEL, BROWNIS, PIZZA!!! AND I GOTTA FINISH A FUCKING ART PROJECT FOR SCHOOL TOMORROWS. WTF. IM SO DAMN LAZY THESE DAYS. TODAY I DIDDNT EVEN GO TO SCHOOL.

I WANNA LOOK LIKE A ARTY ARTSTUDENT WHOS CRAZY SICK IN HIS OWN LITTLE WORLD.DRUUUGS N STUFF A ART U KNOWWW
AT THE SAME HAVE A SUPER COOL PARTY ANIMAL GIRILY TOMBOY PERSONALITY !!!!

JUST DUNNO WHAT TO DO. MY ROOMS A MESS. GOT NO MONEY. NOT SURE ABOUT PARTY TONIGHT.
PRO: WANNA MEET PEOPLE. BE DRUNK. MEET HIM?!!
CONTRA: IM SICK :(
GONNA DO ANOTHER ASPIRIN COMPLEX I THINK ......THEN SEE. GOT A BOTTLE A WINE AND BESTIES COMMING OVER LATER. GOTTA WASH MY HAIR AND STUFF BEFORE :3 NOW IM GONNA MAKE MYSELF A NICE CINNAMON SUGAR CREPE !

"DRINKING WHORE"

THATS WHAT MY BESTIE TOLD ME I AM !!!!!!!!
GUESS I REALLY NEED TO CHANGE A BIT
TODAY I SPENT SHOPPING IN COLOGNE. BOT BLACK BOOTS, BLUE NAILPOLISH, SHEER TIGHTS WITH LINE, GREEN BLOUSE. FEELING FINE. BUT I REAAALLY GOTTA MAKE A PLAN ON I WANT PEOPLE TO SEE ME AND SEE MYSELF. COZ OBVIOUSLY IVE GOT NOT A BIT SELF-CONFIDENCE OR -RESPECT AND WELL THATS JUST SAD...AND RATHER GROSS AND PISSES ME OFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF !

CRAVE YOU

SHIT MAN. IVE GOT NO ONE WHO WANTS ME ATM... I DO CRAVE S ....VUT OH MAN I JUST DUNNO. IM SO FUCKING SCARED OF OPEN UP AND EVEN TOUCHING HIS BELLY (ITS SO SEXY OMG) ! HOW CAN THIS BE HUH??? I NEED A HOW TO BE BRAVE OR SMTH!!!!
WHAT I KNOW IS THAT HE THINKS OF ME RATHER AS A SLUT WHICH I CAN COMPLETLY UNDERSTAND. BUT I WANT HIM TO WANT TO GET TO KNOW ME!!! BUT I CANT SHOW HIM UNLESS IM DRUNK. FUUUUUUUCKKKK WHATS GOING ON?????
( SATURDAY BEEN OUT AGAIN BUT ABSOLUT SOBER !! AND MET HIM IN THE P V ....AND YEAH WE BARELY TALKED AND WHEN T CAME WE WAS GONE. I WAS FREAKIN PISSED AND CONFUSED.)

DIZZY SPEAKS

LAST NIGHT BEEN UMMMMMMMM C R A Z Y. SORT OF.
S (TATOO GUY, OLD AND CHILDISH, VERRRY HANDSOME. LONG-TIME CRUSHER) AND I HOOKED UP.
SPENT THE NIGHT WITH THE SKATERZ , BEEN REAL FUN , BEEN REAL DRUNK. MY OLD ROMANCER AND NOW-FRIEND BEEN THERE TOO ! SO: WE MADE OUT IN DA CITY AND J AND I AND SOME OTHER DUDES WENT TO THEIR PLACE. I SLEPT IN A ROOM WITH P AND S. S TRIED TO SEX ME ALL THE TIME... KINDA EXHAUSTUNG TO CLOSE MY BRA EVERY 10 MINUTES.... ANYWAYS. HE BEEN KINDA ASS THIS MORNING. AFTER WE LEFT P AND J AND ME WENT TO EAT DÖNER AND TO THE MOVIES. P IS SUCH A NICE LADY!!
IM DISSAPOINTED COZ LAST TIME I MET S HE BEEN SUCH A GENTLEMAN AND I THOUGHT THAT HE REALLY WANTED TO GET TO KNOW ME. BUT NOW.................
I HAVE TO DECIDE IF I GO OUT TONIGHT. SEE HIM.
GOOD THING: THE OTHER DUDES REEEAAALLY LIKED ME A LOT I THINK :3

DONT THINK U KNOW WHERE IM AT

I JUST DONT KNOW. THIS IS WHAT I WANT.